Nothing Left to Give

Sliver by sliver they carve off a piece of me.

From my heart. And my time. And my energy.

It’s an all you can TAKE buffet.

They need cleaning and feeding and calming and leading.

They need talks and rides and hugs and hi-fives.

He needs reassurance and affection, and he deserves perfection.

I should meditate and pray and examine all my ways.

But there is scrubbing and mopping, with no sign of stopping.

Work needs focus and insight, to get it done right.

I want to keep in touch, but it’s already too much.

There’s only so much to go around,

and I’m done.

Nothing left to give.

I distract myself with things that require nothing,

Silly books and tv and internet and food.

But they are empty and give nothing back.

I’m as depleted as ever.

Nothing left to give.

…

Then I notice, the people and tasks that take so much,

give so much back as well.

If I take the time to receive it.

If I slow down long enough to appreciate.

Just a little space to notice, to accept,

and I’m renewed!

A sloppy kiss, a snuggle in my arms, filling my heart with their sticky charms.

Without being asked they lend a hand, turning out better than hoped or planned.

A willing partner, a listening ear, a hand in mine and I’ve nothing to fear.

A still, small voice that whispers “peace”, not one more person I have to please.

A place to hide, my own retreat, messy but mine, and that can’t be beat.

Knowing and learning, measured success, giving purpose, letting me be my best.

Family who walk beside me, even far away. Friends to cry with and laugh and play.

There’s more than just me to go around,

and we are strong.

I’ve been given so much.

They aren’t my burden, they’re my blessing.

So here’s me, tired, but so grateful for my babies, and my big kids and my partner in crime.

For my faith, my home, my calling, my family and my friends.

It’s not an easy life, but it is a good one.